Cell Phone Rules

If you plan on getting your adolescent child a cell phone, may I suggest the following rules that I've enacted?

• You can not call me if you are within 30 feet of me (e.g. the backseat of the car).
  
• If you use your camera phone to take another picture of me or your brother in our underwear, you lose the phone.
  
• Do not use your camera phone to send me pictures of your bowel movements or close-ups of the cat's butthole.

More rules will be coming soon. You can count on it.